Hash Trash of the run of sat. 29th oct,2011
Location : porte Dauphine
Presents : Pussy Kat, Tree Shagger, Ohlala, Sharp Shooter, Just Anastasia, Muito Bonbon, Just Nadia, Just Max, Princess Pussy, 9×5 Wanks, Just Ivan, Just François, Socks and Roses, Screwing Nemo, Blue Balls,Just Samantha, Speedy
On a not so sunny afternoon, a good group of hashers met at Porte Dauphine, the gateway to Paris’ green heaven (or hell, depending at what time you visit the mysterious woods nearby). Speedy seemed to have arrived before everyone, quite reassuring – as he was supposed to be the hare. So strange to see that little man in his big white car ! Anyway that was only the first surprising scene that we’ll be given to see that afternoon in the vicinity. Then starts the run, the crowd of happy hashers walking, shouting and running everywhere, still unaware of the horrors to be seen and found just a few minutes later. Soon we get into the local mood as we ran pass one of the only breed of wild animals to be found in this forest : a “travelo” – a real one with high heels, fancy underwear, long artificial hair and natural hairs, heavy make-up (and the list goes on …) As we get deeper inside the woods, the difficulty comes less from finding the flour marking the trail, than from trying to avoid stepping on – or falling over – the many used condoms (around 10 per square meter, according to some reliable scientific studies). Soon it appears to most hashers that Speedy must have deliberately chosen to set up his trail in the worst part of that forest ! How does he know so well where this kind of places are located in such a vast area ? It’s a question that could and should have been raised during the following Circle, but probably most hashers did not – in a diplomatic respect to one of our eldest runner ! Additionally, due to the hare’s fluency in Portuguese language – which appears to be the most common language in this part of Paris during the day (and the night) we can easily understand why Speedy volunteered to be a hare in this place, as finding his way through this jungle is much easier when u speak the local language ! The walkers managed to get lost rapidly, probably distracted from the flour marks by the unusual and over-abundant condom ‘trail marking’. And also undoubtedly more attracted by a “lady gagaesque” person calling them (probably excited by the prospect of ‘partying’ with a couple of sportsmen and women !). At this first beer stop, everyone was amazed by “the running experience” so far, and wondering why the hare was following us in his caNo need to think too much though : we could all guess that he was just hiding himself from somebody in the ‘Bois’ that he had recently met – but left and ran away without paying the full fare (in a very common french manner, impersonated by the past IMF chief). Then the run went on, along “Avenue de la longue Queue” (surprising but true) , along some nice river (no dead body to be seen there that afternoon ; quite boring !) .
And back to civilization. We passed besides the “Grande Cascade”, a multi – Michelin starred restaurant. Too bad at that time of the day the service was over, Fortunately smart Speedy and Co-hare Muito Bonbon had a “B plan’’ and had brought not only beer but also some snacks to eat while enjoying the view : a quiet lake and a real Cascade. Happiness was to be seen in everyone’s eyes – having survived this really unusual and wild run. After this last beer stop we ran a little bit more around this safe area, and were finally greeted at the finishing point by the hare and co-hare with a delicious buffet (thanks also to Sharp Shooter) and a proper circle. See you all at the next run !