Hash Trash 799 by Cock in a Box

Hash #799 – Preparing the mind, liver, and spirit for the 800th festivities

Buttes-Chaumont park (Botzaris metro stop).

The Hare’s for this shiggy run were Just Lisa (named after the run, scroll down for details) and 3 Times the Lady (who swore she was “not fat, just wearing a really puffy coat).

The run started on time (45 minutes late for a Hash isn’t bad by the standards this hasher is used to), and the pack immediately entered Buttes-Chaumont park. The trail wound its way through beautiful scenery of suspension bridges across massive gorges (no mention of whose massive gorge, a hasher never tells. Or maybe that’s always tells, I can never keep it straight. But I digress…) lucious waterfalls, and Greco-Roman ruins (use your imagination a bit). There a wonderful picture check from one of the ruins (I believe you call them Hash Views?). Then the trail doubled back on itself several times as Just Lisa lost her own trail. She mentioned something about a brutal hangover? We then left the park for a bit of parkour (I think that’s what you folks call urban running?). We arrived at a hot wine stop (a wonderful replacement to the beer stop on such a cold day). 3 X Lady conveniently placed it next to a childrens playground and since every hasher is mentally between the ages of 2 and 6 as was requested by the playground signage. After the wine stop, trail headed back towards the park and ended rather abruptly (it was all of 300 meters from the playground back to the park). Then it was time for the circle.

The Down-Down’s following the run included, but may not have been limited to:

For Their Trail – The Hares (Just Lisa, 3 X Lady)
3 X Lady then drank again for her wearing of headgear.
Virgins (only one) – Just Ann from San Francisco, US)
Newcumer – Cock in a Box from SCH4 (Cincinnati, OH, US)
Returning after a prolonged absence from the hash – White Sox, Just Anastasia, and Le Petit Wee Wee
White Sox and Just Anastasia then drank again for their wearing of headgear
FRBs (Front Running Bastards) – Cock in a Box
SCBs (Short Cutting Bastards) – Oohlala!
Unintentional “Live Haring” – The Hares
Intentional “False advertising” – The Hares
For eating the flour (was not actually flour) to see if he was on trail – Cock in a Box
For jumping in a check – Muito Bonbon
A self-accusation for skipping town before the 800th – Le PetitWee Wee

After much cold singing and debauchery, the hash decided that it had come time to name Just Lisa. She was made to stand in the cold, awkwardly watching a children’s playground (pedophilia anyone?) while the circle came up with her real name. Dismissing suggestions of “Posh Frog” (Brit with a froggy voice) and “Little Lost Lisa” (She got lost several times on her own trail), the hash settled on the name “Where the Fuck are my Tits”

Announcements: The Hash was reminded (as if we needed a reminder) that the 800th run was quickly approaching.

-Cock in a Box

[800th run] feb-18 Saturday night Fever: “dance card is full!”

Dress according to the theme of the evening : “Paris je t’aime”.

Message from the 800th Disorganizing Committee:

It’s official, the following are having an affair with Princess Pussy in Paris on Saturday night (Feb. 18th). For those wankers who were too slow, her dance card is full. She is however open for Friday night pub crawl (pay as you go), Saturday run (10 euros), Sunday historical run (5 euros).
Remaining T-shirts will be sold by auction. By the way, you who are on the list, send Half Crazy your size and if you have a color preference :golden yellow or light blue. No guarantee on size/ color. First come first served.

Pull The Prick Out	Paris
Bender	Paris
Half Crazy	Paris
Gonzo	Paris
Just Stupid	Paris
Just Cathy	Paris
Princess Pussy	Paris
The Anarchist	Paris
Just Dominique	Paris
Speedy Gonzalez	Paris
Muito Bonbon	Paris
Ooh La La!	Paris
Hyper	Paris
French Kiss/FL	Paris
Anaconda	Paris
Shaggy	Paris
Milky Thistle	Paris
Just Lisa	Paris
Just David	Paris
Sleeping Sex	Paris
Burning Bush	Paris
McGoose
BlondAss
Up and Down	Paris
Hole in One	Paris
Ma Bouche	Paris
Crappy Strappy	Paris
Running Commentary	Paris
Just Minock	Paris
Frog Banger	Paris
Just Kim	Loan Do
Dirtie Girtie	Luxembourg
Wank Gogh	Luxembourg
See Nipples and Die	Luxembourg
Just Flo	Luxembourg
F* Me Boots	Luxembourg
Half Cock	City Hash/West London
Higgins	Brussells H3
Paparassi	Amst.
War & Piece	Amst.
Bold Fokker	The Hague
Tonguejob	The Hague
Sticky Thumb	Florida
Silver Hummer	Florida
Colonic Irrigation	Mijas-Spain
Gang Bang	Mijas-Spain
Rusky Pussy	Mijas-Spain
Just Liana	Mijas-Spain
Eggshell Blond	Mijas-Spain
Li Lo Lill	Mijas-Spain
Sperm Whale	UK
Mashed Potato	UK
Polly	Dublin
Just Nessa	Dublin
Sauna Bitch	Moscow/Lille
Just Tania	Lille
Punch Bag
Hazukashii	Stuttgard
Thunder Tits	Calgary
Cosmo	Munich
Lemonentry	Bern
Dilly
Just Christine
Wet and Ready	Zurich
Thirsty Thursday	Zurich
Cock in a Box	Paris
Virgin room mate	Paris

Bizzz & OnOn,
1/2C

Paris Hash Run799 – Saturday 4th February 2012

Date: Saturday, February 4, 2012
Time: 14H

• Hare: 3xLady and Just Lisa

• bouffe: Petit WeeWee

• Meeting point: just inside the Buttes-Chaumont park using the gate closest to Botzaris metro.

• How to get there: Botzaris metro – line 7 bis

♥ Paris Hash 800th Run – details of program->  parishash.wordpress.com/18feb-800th/

View Larger Map

“Special On After”:

Dear friends & chers amis

Nous sommes à Paris ! Aline et Caitlin te/vous invitons à fêter notre retour du Brésil autour d’une soirée arrosée de cocktéls bresiliens, la bonne bouffe française que nous a manqué, et toute autre chose que nous mettrons sur la table !
Le moment revient pour tchatcher en au moins 3 langues, boire trop, danser le samba (avec les pas du roc sans doute), fumer sur le balcon, et on ne fera même pas peur à Millefeuille
Habillez-vous de vos chaussettes préférées!

Eh oui, ben, c’est samedi 4 février, 20h jusqu’au dernier metro
118 rue du Chemin Vert, 5è étage droite.
Toutes les contributions à boire seront les bienvenues !

RSVP puis venez nombreux !

Beijos
Aline & Caitlin
0148053360
0761628264

Hash Trash # 798 by The Anarchist

January 22, 2012 by Paris Hash House Harriers
Where : Foret de Meudon
Hare : French Kiss

Theme:  “Hash is your sin”

And as we discovered later many hash sins were truly committed . Not to mention the GM Half Crazy sinful attitude preferring a love affair to hash attendance .

We were waiting in despair around 2 pm at Chaville , facing the drizzle and gusty winds when PPO arrived and suddenly the rain stopped !

French Kiss took a false excuse to get The Anarchist and Speedy for a drive to a lake nearby so that we could taste his Spanish liquor in a tin. Our first sin, we confess.

We managed to gather for the instructions of the Hare and started frantically for a jolly run while the walkers led by Anaconda were lost after a few minutes walk, looking for the trail around the RER station on a map and ignoring the flour signs every 5 meters…….

Fortunately after a few calls with the Hare and helped by the flair of Just Voyou and the enthusiasm of Just Alexandre, the walkers reached the Foret de Meudon.

Just Stupid, PPO and Princess Pussy were leading the pack , hoping probably that it was a race when a first Check Back 18 reminded thoes foolish FRB’s that French Kiss was THE Specialist of CB double digits.

So the pack regrouped again and began to explore the hilly , shiggy part of the Forest and it turned into a hiking party of breathing fellows .

For some reasons to be explained Speedy was leading the pack with his horn, in the good direction uphill while we where desesperately trying to find this bloody trail.

And things got worse when after a check point we found the right trail with a X FT mark followed by flour signs then by a so called false check point that led to a false false trail followed by a false On On……..

The pack was confused and thought the Hare did the run twice, onwards and backwards without noticing , mightbe a side effect of the Spanish liquor …….

This dirty trick lasted for a couple of miles but we decided not to be fooled again by this act of sabotage and followed our Hash instinct.

At each official checkpoints we were wondering who could that be ( a jealous Hasher from a concurrent Hash ….) when we caught Screwing Nemo in action of putting a square flour on the trip .

Just Melina, Hyper, Running Commentary and Slack Mac found their last resources to the Beer stop near a romantic lake and we were joined by the Cycling Kids Squad preceding the walkers’ group and shared a well deserved beer.

On On again in the forest . Just Ivan was fighting with his sweater and his anorak blowing in the wind , I suspect as he is a very cautious virgin hasher he had also a sleeping bag and a tent in his pockets, one never knows…….

French Kiss tried to lose the Harriettes at a lady’s check in the nearby “cité” , hopefully Princess Pussy had the blond attitude to find the right trail in the opposite direction. Well done.

The last part of the run was going down to rescue our painful knees and thighs and Ooh la La even prayed for next hashes to be downhill only . Probably a side effect from missing the Hash 2 months.

And so we regrouped at the lake for the On On celebration by PPO.

The list of sins was quite impressive but French Kiss poured his liquor again in the tin and I do not remember all of them but at least :

• Just Melina and Just Ivan for being a virgin
• Seven and our co beermaster, Ooh La La, Slack Mac as returnees
• French Kiss for his nevrotic attempt to fool the pack, joined by Screwing Nemo the hidden co hare
• PPO, French Kiss, Princess Pussy and Just Stupid for having group sex, evidence was shown by Ooh La La le voyeur and at the disposal of Anaconda or Just Cathy if needed ……
• PPO, Just Stupid and The Anarchist for being FRB’s again
• PPO for shiggiest shaved legs
• Speedy Gonzalez for still being on summertime hour so arriving one hour in advance and summoned to lend his flashy yellow watch to our GM Half Crazy

And after the hash hymn, we shared a wonderful Chile con carne prepared by French Kiss and accommodated with rice and Mrs Besson famous spicy West Indies sauce . Another excuse to have another beer to quench the mouth fire.

On On
The Anarchist

800th Run Celebration

Just to remind you that the 800th run is coming soon with a 3 day programme already announced on February 17th/18th and 19th.

The mismanagement team has worked and drunk hard, now we have the party spot, T shirts delivered tomorrow and the Bois de Vincennes has no more secrets to the hares. Just need to exercise on Hash songs at next runs …..

So please confirm your attendance or not to GM Half Crazy daisybc2000@yahoo.com

Your guests are welcome.

Visitors from foreign Hashes have started to book this now becoming an international Hash event !!!!

To make it a success we need also your help to promote this event locally to the foreign / expat community .

You may use the flyer attached or reuse the post posted on the website.

During these three days we need also your help . Just let us know.

On On – The Anarchist

800_Flyer_final

Hash Trash # 797 by Half Crazy

This should be the run report 797. I wouldn’t call it a run report since I was walking and couldn’t witness all the strange things that happened during the run but I did notice though that Speedy appeared at the beer stop very very late, but who would be surprised, the run was set in Pigalle after all. No one knows where he went because when he finally showed up, he had not met PPO who had left the beer stop to go and rescue him. We had to send a rescue squad for her !
Other lost hashers, Just Willy and Just Corentin, Just Corentin insisting to be pushed in his pram and Just Willy refusing to push the pram up and down the 3 thousands stairs the trail went through. They reached a compromise and both went for a drink in a bar.

It was not a very warm day, so we were happy to have a rather short circle followed by a much longer On After at Running Commentary & Just Monique’s cosy place. Thanks to both of them for their warm welcome.
OK, the circle was short, but we still managed to give a few downdowns, to
- The Hare, Running Commentary for a picturesque trail.
- Hole in One and Up and Down for transferring to Paris from Cyprus
- Hole in One for wearing head gear
- Hyper and Just Willy for losing their child or trying to
- Petit Wee Wee, Just Lisa and Up and down for using new shoes. Of course, they had to drink from them. Up and Down did try to spare his new shoes by borrowing PPO’s but ended up deciding against it. Why???
- Up and Down and Petit Wee Wee for using technology on the hash
- Muito Bonbon for finding flour on the trail
- Speedy for getting lost
- Speedy for a mysterious scar on his cheek: the official version was that he fell while drunk but we have a different idea….
- Just Stupid, The Anarchist, PPO, Bender and Petit Wee Wee for being FRBs, again
- Sleeping Sex and Pussy Kat for not noticing anything Profane or Sacred during the run (remember it was the theme of the run) when we passed so many churched and even more sex shops.
See you all on Jan. 21st at “”Paris Hash Is Your Sin” run. Promising!

OnOn,
Half Crazy

Paris Hash Run # 798 – Saturday 21 January 2012

Next Run: “Paris Hash is Your Sin”

When: Saturday 21st January 2012
Time: 14H00
Where : RER C Station “Chaville Vélizy”

Hare: French Kiss
Boof: French Kiss’ yummy Chile con Carne

Message from hare: “Forest run + walkers trail. Kids are welcome. Let me know who plans to come (Chile’s size) with a doodle”   http://www.doodle.com/6cnwsbauwtavqt22

Paris Hash turns 800 on February 18th 2012 !!

 

Programme:

1- Friday Feb. 17: Pub crawl in Paris

2- Sat. Feb. 18: 800th run – Bois de Vincennes

3- Sat. Feb. 18: Party starting at 8pm with drinks, buffet and DJ

4-Sun. Feb. 19: Historical run

 

 

Registration :

 

Full package including 800th T shirt , 2 runs and access to Saturday night party for 65€

 

You may choose only :

 

Event T shirt for 20€

Party drinks and buffet for 35€

800th run for 10€

801st for 5€

 

You need to register in advance with Paris Hash GM Half Crazy contact daisybc2000@yahoo.com

Venue and payment details sent by reply

 

The Anarchist recommends :  Hotel Verlain 3*, 97 rue Saint Maur,  75011 Paris, affordable, close to Saturday evening party place. http://www.verlain.fr/hotel.html

Paris Hash Run # 797 – Saturday 7th January 2012

“Sacred and Profane” run

 

When : Saturday 7th January 2012

 

Time: 14H00

 

Where : Place Pigalle by the Fountain

 

Hares : Running Commentary and Just Monique

 

How to get there : Metro lines 2 and 12

 

 Message from Hares:  “After party at our apartment (very close to the place). We will supply food, but BYOB.” 

Paris Hash Trash # 796 by Likes A Quicky

Hash Trash,  Paris Hash House Harriers run number 796

Laid by Hare Bender and virgin (or bunny hare) Princess Pussy took us on an interesting trail winding and looping through the different faces of La Defence, from the unassuming industrial backend to the super modern landscape of highrises and reflective glass, standing out against the never-ending plains of concrete and stone Paris.

And so we explored this city of the future, with each building trying to outdo the next in terms of avant garde, enhanced by sculptures such as the Giant Thumb or the man with half his head chopped as well as scores of unrecognisable, novel forms.

The trail took off to a “twisted” start, with us having to double back on several false trails. Later in the “down down” there was general consent that the combination of flour “droppings” by Bender and arrows by the Bunny Hare Pussy on the trees (even though executed with designer flair) were confusing. Since the arrows were on the trees and the droppings on the ground we did not know to focus high or low and perhaps got lost somewhere in the middle. But egged on with a wink and a nudge from the green man we eventually broke through.

There were some other interesting twists on the trail including the viewpoint of the mirror, where we caught The Anarchist and Just Stupid worshipping their own images. And where Tree Shagger momentarily forgot herself and was caught hugging a tree. We thought that we got photographic evidence of this but she must have somehow gotten hold of the camera – for the image is no more! But the image is ever imprinted in the memories of those who saw it.

The Anarchist and Just Stupid further exhaled in their glory, taking advantage of the gap left by other Front Running Bitches such as Ooh La La and Princess Pussy, who were off licking their wounds with the walkers, handicapped and injured but who later admitted to the accusation of being plain “pathetic.”

 Heading back into La Defence we had some extraordinary urban views and photos as we did the ups and downs of the hilly stairs in the urbanscape with Shaggy powered on by ever-enthusiastic Sprinkler (who was sprinkling away at the foot of as many buildings as possible).

Now, why such a finely equipped team of walkers arrived 30-40 mins later than the runners at the on in was a mystery to all. And as she was later accused in the “down-down” the bunny hare Princess Pussy had gotten lost on her very own trail, and despite, what they themselves had let slip, in a confusion of accusations, the use of technology – cell phones between Princess Pussy and Ooh La La. Possibly when the challenge of the run was dropped, or confused by the change of their pace they descended into plain daydreaming – finally to be drowned in a revelry of mulled wine, they eventually drifted unsuspectingly in. And we could finally gather on Bender’s balcony for the circle.

 And so, to the sound of Sprinkler’s abandoned yapping 5 floors below the circle unfolded in the cold winter evening. And as the dark and cold descended in the citadel of La Defence the inner warmth and jolliness and merriment rose (largely thanks to the warmth of Bender’s generosity) and the line of beer bottles on the windowsill got longer. And those in the surrounding citadel must well have wondered as to the strange rituals that were unfolding. Truly it was a circle – or eclipse – with a life of its own that no-one wanted to close.

Princess Pussy AKA PP was initiated in her role as bunny (virgin) hare. The Shaggs; Shaggy Shagger, Shagg and Treeshagger were multiply accused with the zealous new refrain that “when one Shagg drinks all Shaggs drink!”

 Just Stupid and The Anarchist were accused of being vain.

 Visiting Hasher Saddlesore and Bondai hailing from Sydney were welcomed.

 Ooh La La, RA, took the risk of bringing up the subject of Bender’s disappearance at the Christmas dinner to which he replied don’t ask – at least easing Ooh La La’s wonder at whether it was a result of his poor conversation.

 Sleeping Sex was caught totally unexpectedly, much to her disbelief and dismay, even bordering on horror at being called up on three consecutive accusations. Gone were her days of dozing through the hash in her blissful incognito. In an attempt to ease her bewilderment thank you to Just Stupid for taking the trouble to translate her last accusation.

 On the subject of Hash clothing, the newly-named Likes a Quicky, just recovering from her naming ceremony was briskly stripped by the unhesitating hands of Half Crazy – almost to her bra. Yes, she concedes, she must buy a hash clothing item – but so also was the brilliant idea of a hash bra born, an idea that seems to hold promise for a bright future.

 Half Crazy was eventually, though exposed to the most compromising of song “Daisy, Daisy, Daisy”

Eventually we reluctantly had to bring the circle to a close – for the sake of the neighbours. But the party continued inside, late into the night with the additions of Nipple Nibbler and the very acrobatic little Adrian. Ideas for Paris Hash 800 were discussed and a late night music appreciation session followed, allowing us to discover a whole new side to Bender – other than the furry toilet seat which Shagg (who was truly delighted to be in Bender’s) had pointed out earlier.

 Private message: Shagg has to contact Half Crazy, for reasons known only by them.